I was pondering what to say, how to say what is on my heart. I am blind in my own sins so very often. I complain or I wish or I pity myself and this morning I realize what often tears me up is exactly what I do to others. I could give excuses. I could give reasons. In my brain now, I have them built up. Daily, I desperately need to call upon the Lord, ask Him to cleanse me of my sins, show me where I’m falling and grieving the Holy Spirit.
Here’s where the Lord is bringing me, pray. Instead of thinking, praying. Praying continuously. If a person has wronged me, pray. If a person has hurt my feelings, pray. The idea that I need to build up a federal case against someone who has injured my heart is not from God. I need to pray.
2 Corinthians 12:
there was given me a thorn ([a]a splinter) in the flesh, a messenger of Satan, to rack and buffet and harass me, to keep me from being excessively exalted.
8 Three times I called upon the Lord and besought [Him] about this and begged that it might depart from me;
9 But He said to me, My grace (My favor and loving-kindness and mercy) is enough for you [sufficient against any danger and enables you to bear the trouble manfully]; for Mystrength and power are made perfect (fulfilled and completed) and [b]show themselves most effective in [your] weakness. Therefore, I will all the more gladly glory in my weaknessesand infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ (the Messiah) may rest (yes, may[c]pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me!
10 So for the sake of Christ, I am well pleased and take pleasure in infirmities, insults, hardships, persecutions, perplexities and distresses; for when I am weak [[d]in human strength], then am I [truly] strong (able, powerful [e]in divine strength).
I cannot even begin to tell you how much I have said these verses aloud, in my head, to others. My pastor said something to me about suffering and Job. I’m not going to do it justice but here’s my best stab. When the Lord allowed (big word) Satan to rob Job of his children, money, status, etc…that was one level. There is something very profound that the Lord and Satan both understood and understand, when Satan came back a second time…it was for Job. To destroy Job with pain, physical pain.
Friends, I do not know what was Paul’s thorn. Quite honestly, now, it could have been anything. When people ask how I am doing and I have to say I’m still dizzy. I still have near constant ringing in my ears. It’s depressing. I don’t want to be that person. I want to be the one..do you hear that? It’s subtle but I believe lies when I start on this road. Who do I want to give this to? Nobody! Who would I rather have “be that person”? Good grief. When dear ones ask, I need to be truthful. Yet I can also continue to remember, His grace (His favor, His loving-kindness, His mercy)..I can boast in that. I can remember and recall for those who ask that His grace is enough for me.
I want to be a reflection of His grace, just like this picture. I spend way too much time with my thoughts yet His strength, His power are made perfect in my weaknesses. Oh how lovely, friends, if this trial gives me more of His strength, more of His power..that they are made more effective in my weakness..I open my hands. I give myself over to the work of God.
To glory in the work of God in my life…
To have God pitch a tent over me! Over you!
I am strong. Not because of anything in my person, but because divine strength. You are strong.
My Noah is in a constantly listening to the same track of songs..one of them is by Group 1 Crew..He Said..
You may be knocked down now
but don’t forget what He said, He said
I won’t give you more, more then you can take
and I might let you bend, but I won’t let you break
and No-o-o-o-o, I’ll never ever let you go-o-o-o-o
Don’t you forget what He said
Who you are ain’t what your going through
So don’t let it get the best of you
Cause God knows everything you need,
so you ain’t gotta worry
God knows everything we need.
- God’s Grace (bummyla.wordpress.com)
- Strength in Weakness (loopyloo305.com)
- Learning to Follow the Holy Spirit (todaysfreshmanna.wordpress.com)
- Precious Prayer (jeanbrunson.com)